Tag Archives | studies

Worried about David

It rained again.

Again, it is always the rain that would put me into deep thoughts.

It feels like the rain might have some super pow­er over me I don’t know.

I was hav­ing a con­ver­sa­tion with David, when he told me that he already got a boy friend now. I should have thought better.

Read­ing Apol­lo David’s post on being kind, I felt the same sit­u­a­tion is bestow upon me.

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The Malaysian Politics

I am here now, lying down on the firm and com­fort­able hotel bed, exhaust­ed and yet ‘enjoy­ful’ typ­ing this entry of the blog post.

I have been out of the coun­try for a very long time, that I have lost count already. My pass­port has been abused and harassed numer­ous times, that I think that abuse might turn into an enjoy­ment. One do won­der, do the cus­tom’s offi­cers enjoyed spank­ing the on the vis­i­tor’s pass­ports when they embark into the country.

Here I am, in Welling­ton, New Zealand. I must say, I have met a lot of peo­ple from all over the world, From Argenti­na, to Brazil right up to New Zealand.

I could say that I can’t wait to get back to Malaysia, back to my not so clos­et self, back to all the hyp­o­crit­i­cal peo­ple, back to all that polit­i­cal bull­shits. Yes, I have been fol­low­ing the Per­ak by-elec­tions, and I can tell you, I think these idiots should just do the world a favor, and bury them­selves. Con­tin­ue Reading →

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The problems

Sleep­less­ness, that is what I can use to describe myself.

I would want to blame it on the dif­fer­ent time zones, they call it jet lagged. Yes, I have been liv­ing on a jet set­ter’s lifestyle since late Novem­ber. It was fun, to be able to trav­el all around, meet­ing dif­fer­ent peo­ple before I start myself in Uni in May.

But that is not the point, the point is, I want­ed to stay away from my home in Kuala Lumpur. I had want­ed to do this for a very long time, try­ing to see if I could for­get the boy. The truth is, I can’t. On the boy’s birth­day last year, while I was in Brazil, I gave the boy a call to wish him a hap­py birth­day. I mean, it would only be appro­pri­ate if I do that, at least, I thought it that way.

Not only was I wrong about the whole thing, I still end­ed up cry­ing at night, hug­ging a pil­low, that I was well aware that it would not hug me back.

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College and higher education

The doc­tor had asked me to stay away from caf­feine. It was one of the main rea­sons why I was always anx­ious about things that are hap­pen­ing around me. I stopped tak­ing cof­fee as my dai­ly rou­tine, and it helped tremendously.

Aside from that, I am also on a cou­ple of drugs that the doc­tor had pre­scribed me, it real­ly help a lot in terms of both talk­ing with L, and my office col­leagues. Not only did it kept me calm down most of the time, it also helped me to think about things ratio­nal­ly, and exe­cute my plans well.

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