The Heart Breaking Moment

This post is pub­lished with­out proof­read­ing. If you are look­ing for a per­fect writ­ten post, you have come to the wrong page

I guess many had already known that I main­tain a few Face­book account.

On the recent event on Face­book, I had encoun­tered some­thing that had kept me awake, and not sure what to do.

It was mid­night yes­ter­day that I received a friend request. It was­n’t a friend request on Face­book that I would nor­mal­ly ignore, because this time, it was a per­son that I know from anoth­er account; A per­son that I had had great inter­est with before he mys­te­ri­ous­ly dis­ap­peared from my life.

I sent him a mes­sage, pre­tend­ing that I do not know him. Which is the right thing to do, I think. Even pri­or to that, I had thought of just ignor­ing the friend request, and move on. I spent the whole day think­ing about it, and could not reach a deci­sion. I mes­saged him.

Jai is a sweet per­son, from my point of view. I was unof­fi­cial­ly intro­duced by anoth­er friend of mine. Unof­fi­cial­ly because my oth­er friend just gave me his con­tact, and I just blind­ly added him. The con­ver­sa­tion was very straight for­ward. From the con­ver­sa­tion, I was able to gouge how a per­son he is. Eng­lish-speak­ing, good com­mon sense, likes to be pho­tographed, likes pho­tog­ra­phy. All in all, my type of boy.

Most impor­tant­ly I think, he has a lit­tle per­son­al­i­ty from The Boy.

I always find it men­tal­ly tir­ing to go through all that. The per­son sends you a mes­sage telling you that he is will­ing to meet up, for din­ner, for a movie. I don’t care.

Then at that very moment when you are wait­ing for the final text mes­sage for con­fir­ma­tion, the friend inter­rupts and ‘advise’ him not to go.

Of course, as with many oth­er times, these ‘friends’ are always not respon­si­ble when things go wrong, and quick­ly claims cred­it when things run their way. I have just had one time too many expe­ri­ences on that.

Don’t both­er me, I am just anoth­er per­son who had not had slept because of this. Whether should I tell him, “hey, I am this per­son that you chat with before, and our his­to­ry did not real­ly went on that well.” I can’t live a lie. That Face­book account was­n’t build to inter­act. It was built for anoth­er purpose.

I had, once again let down of my hors­es. This time, streak of tears mys­te­ri­ous­ly appear on both side of my cheeks. Just when I thought I may had found the per­son that I could care for, that I could love just maybe I thought to myself. Just maybe.

He was right in a way. It’s like Music and Lyrics. Looks for Music and Per­son­al­i­ty for lyrics. Music is what draws you in, what comes after is usu­al­ly the lyrics, some­thing that gives the melody its meaning.

He claims that he would not want to meet because he had not known me bet­ter. He said that he had not seen how I looked like, and ask for a pic­ture. Of course, back in my head would be the count­less encoun­ters of peo­ple telling me that I do not look like my pic­ture, or the count­less peo­ple telling me that I am fat, while I am still seat­ed in my car, await­ing for the per­son to actu­al­ly appear. How exact­ly do you judge a per­son is fat, with just look­ing at 5 % of his body, which com­pro­mised of 90% bone mass? I have still yet to fig­ure that out.

Jai, think about this. You want­ed to have some­one who you can love. I am here. You had want­ed to get a Nikon D90, I am here. While I can­not promise that I would your one and only per­son in your love life, I can how­ev­er promise you that I will try to be that per­son. Then again, no thanks to your ‘friend’, I guess you do not stand a chance now.

I thought it could be a very good night when he actu­al­ly show up at my place. Well not exact­ly that because he had request­ed me to pick him up. I thought of bring­ing him over for the night KL night lights, per­haps some snacks.

Oh well, should have cook and eat­en instead of wait­ing for some­one who lis­tens more to their friends than his own instinct.

Per­haps the ignore but­ton did try to serve its pur­pose. I should have just back­pack again like how I used to do last time. Or per­haps, just grab a cam­era and start tak­ing pic­tures of my Gundams.

, , ,

5 Responses to The Heart Breaking Moment

  1. Jai February 19, 2010 at 11:45 am #

    Im sur­prised there were some twist in the sto­ry. But nev­er­the­less you secret is safe with me; i guess my instincts saved you this time. I appre­ci­ate the offer. But my dreams alone are meant for these hands(mine) to make it a real­i­ty. The music and lyrics part you missed out one very impor­tant note. Musics and lyrics coex­ist, peo­ple gets attract­ed to music before lyrics, no mat­ter how you try to deny. Its the ugly truth, but then again the taste in music dif­fers, so you can’t real­ly say which music is prefer­able except to the extend of that par­tic­u­lar indi­vid­ual. I wish you luck; for i can­not give you what you seek. My instincts were to fol­low my friends advice. I can’t believe im read­ing your blog, but then again; my instincts. ^^

  2. Reszurrecdito M. d'saintner February 20, 2010 at 2:44 pm #

    Just won­dered why you main­tain so many Face­book accounts?

  3. mr.d March 17, 2010 at 9:41 am #


  4. jimy April 6, 2010 at 3:44 pm #

    it’s life

  5. Tyler June 24, 2010 at 4:36 pm #

    Aww cheer up =) Hugs

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: