Holding hands

Holding Hands

One of the nice things in a rela­tion­ship is hold­ing hands.

I like to hold the boy’s hands. Whether is it in the car, or just gen­er­al­ly giv­ing him that brisk hug that he deserves.

Hold­ing hands to me is the kind of phys­i­cal inti­ma­cy that is the kind of expres­sion of feel­ings that I have for the boy. It gives the means of being present in that some­one’s per­son­al space. I hold hands with the boy, is because I want to share the things that he has, the per­son­al space.

Hold­ing hands sig­ni­fi­cates the affec­tion that I have to the boy.

Of recent, the boy has been avoid­ing hold­ing my hand. Not to say total­ly avoid, but rather, with lit­tle response when I try to hold his hand…

I am con­fused with the kind of rela­tion­ship that we are hav­ing now. We are in a rela­tion­ship that no one, and not even our­self could explain or put a name to it. We are not boy friends, but we do things that oth­er cou­ple do togeth­er. We are not friends, because the amount of inti­ma­cy, and care, and atten­tion that we give each oth­ers already war­rant it to be otherwise.

Then again, it is hard for any­one to explain what kind of rela­tion­ship we are in. As much as I would want the boy to get back to me, he is reluc­tant because I kept on hurt­ing him, subconsiously.

It is com­mon for cou­ple with a wider age gap to share a dif­fer­ent opin­ions over cer­tain things or sit­u­a­tion. It hap­pened for gen­er­al­ly quite a num­ber of times, and most of the times each of us would debate on what is for the better.

I how­ev­er, do not believe that the age dif­fer­ence is a per­ma­nent dam­age to our rela­tion­ship. I believe that things will work out fine, but the amount of hurt feel­ings keep on com­ing, and pour­ing to our already sore hearts, will it ever stop?

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2 Responses to Holding hands

  1. ahBONG September 2, 2008 at 8:13 pm #

    no new updates gei?

  2. Cedric Ang September 3, 2008 at 2:44 am #

    BONG, very moody, thats why.

    Read my new entries, then you will know

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