I could not explain why, but of recent, I have seldom think about The Boy. Yes, no more sleepless night, crying thinking of him and stuff. I am glad, for once because I think I have finally conquered the feeling of letting The Boy go.

Then, there is Harry that comes into picture.

If you remember Harry, Harry got a little too uncomfortable after our session along with David. Although David had not had sex with both of us that day when they were at my place, I had fun with Harry. Harry still refuse to talk about it, perhaps from the shyness that I would expect him to have. Well at least a little.

David on the other hand decided that perhaps retail business isn’t really his thing. Well, I warned him few months before his attempt into it. Now that he is arranging interviews with other companies and etc, lets hope he is doing well.

The Boy however, gave me a shock of my lifetime, still.

Stories and rumors of The Boy actually had me as his first boy friend was shocking enough to put me into disbelieve for the next couple of days. Perhaps that is why he was so hard to let go himself when we broke up the first, and second time. Perhaps it was also one of the reason The Boy was so ‘easy’ on me on the courting part. Speaking of which, it is almost 1 1/2 years since I have seen The Boy. I would really love to just show up in front of his door step, and just say hi.

Recently, I have uploaded videos to a popular website. Not YouTube because YouTube do not allow illicit content. With that in mind, perhaps readers like you could suggest where I can upload, with a rather huge community of Malaysians preferred. So far, two of my videos were taken offline because apparently some person or people are complaining that my videos are in violation of copyright. My never seen video, of my own, having sex. Right!

I checked my web statistic and noticed that a few people are coming from Yahoo Mail, Google and stuff. They all ended up at my main page, and not some random page of my blog. I guess, someone might be promoting me again. Maybe the email states something like, “ewww look at this guy, so gay!” Now all you wankers homophobic hypocrites can go slap yourself on the face when you wank to Megan Fox, because she already admitted that she’s a man.

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Harry MSN’ed me the other day. I was surprised to say the least; I had figured out it is either of the two things. One, Harry had broken up with the boy friend, or two Harry wanted to scold me for something, or both of it.

I was right, they broke up.

In fact, Harry had broke up a few weeks ago, and had been dating this guy that I know.

Fine.

I was happy for Harry actually, it has been almost two months since Harry had spoken with me. Wasn’t sure what had happened between them, but I guess things were not working out. I had never liked a boy friend that controls my social life, to say the least.

So Harry told me who his ex boy friend was. It was this guy that is always in ‘competition’ with me. A person that thought he knew who am I by knowing that I owned cedricang.com and knowing me by name. Too bad, he wasn’t in the game long enough. I guess he was jealous because I always get my boys before him, no puns intended, and not to be little Harry, or any other boys.

We did catch on on the phone for a while, before Harry had to go swimming with his new boy friend. I had to let him go at that point of time, he is afterall, not mine to begin with.

So Harry, would really love to catch up with you because I have many tales. That short 15 minutes phone conversation isn’t enough, to speak frankly. There’s still a lot, and a lot did happen in that short two months.

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Firstly, it was Harry.

If you had read the previous few entries, you would read that problem had started after Harry and me got together in a position that we should have never imagine any of us to be, even as buddies.

That day, before us parting, we were at this restaurant, and were commenting on how the Italian food there could have tasted better. I wasn’t sure why, but I had suggested that I cook and let Harry and David try if my cooking were better. Of course, things did not went as we planned, as Harry had ignored me for the weekend.

I had tried to put the things behind, and tried to concentrate with the cooking. I had failed.

First, the spaghetti turned out too hard because I had missed about 5 minutes on it. The carbonara turned out too bland because I had forgotten to add in the salt.

Presentation wise, I guess it was okay. Besides the set back, David who I had brought to my house said that it was normal. It would be nicer if the spaghetti was a little softer. I guess.

David stayed over at my place because he had wanted to use the computer. He wanted to search for a part time job for the school holidays, and I thought I could use the company. Time to time, we would have small talks, and time to time, Harry would be mentioned. David told me that sometimes it is best to let things go away, what isn’t yours eventually will not be yours no matter how tight you grab it. I wish I could, but I just can’t

Even that short moment of time that I had with Harry had already given me such impact, now it is almost unimaginably hard for me to let go of the boy, for that period much more longer.

Over the few days, I kept on thinking of Harry.

I ended up cooking the same thing again.

and again

and again

I have finally ran out of creme, and spaghetti. I am not too sure if I will go back and get more, but I guess, I will let my tummy rest for the time being.

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