Happy Birthday, 2012

On the 21st of December, last year I told myself, that I would want to write something here, that obligatory post that I post  every year.

To be fair, I did try to pen something, although I would not say pen because that ‘pen something’ was actually a form of virtual entry that I have in my brain, that sorta thing.

The one sided message eventually ended. The number I think have switched hands a couple of times, as I have seen different profile pictures on Whatsapp for that number. I didn’t try to message, but perhaps I want to keep it, for old time’s sake.

Should I be still writing about him? Should I be still thinking about him? Should I be still wondering how is he and what is he doing?

I have never been into a relationship so real, or so fake before. Real because it is taking me forever to forget about the boy; lets be real, how can one forget something so easily, unless we have something that bonk onto our head. How can it be fake, then? I remember a whole lot of time spending together, but I don’t remember much about doing things together. Sex, out for drink, and that’s about it.

I still fail to locate his Facebook. He’s the kinda person that would do anything to protect his privacy, but I don’t think he blocked me or anything. I just can’t do a ‘search’ on him. I can’t stalk his friends because he had kept two different sets of friends; the gay ones, and the hypocrites.

He did appeared on LinkedIn, where somehow we are well somehow connected. From the looks of it, he didn’t manage to finish what I started for him, and is now working in the cosmetic line, which is something I would imagine him doing,

I always asked myself, was he worth the time that I keep on reminding myself of what we never had? Is it cheating that I sometimes think about him? We are human being, after all. Right?

Happy birthday 22nd, L.

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2 Responses to Happy Birthday, 2012

  1. WP January 31, 2013 at 3:26 am #

    Stumbled onto yr blog. Read some of yr older posts. Think I can relate to yr melancholy state of mind (I presume you have not gotten over that relationship). It’s been 2 years + since I last broke up with my ex. I still do think of him now & then. But I know that with time, that feeling will pass. Take care & please continue to write.

    • Cedric Ang February 10, 2013 at 8:22 pm #

      @WP, as much as I do, but I guess it’s best to keep it away from my boy friend.

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