Love makes you do stupid things

I feel damn fuck­ing stu­pid now. Yes, I am damn fuck­ing stu­pid. I thought I can pull some strings and thought every­thing would go well.

No, instead, I have to endure 1 hour of the his tor­ment, not only that, it leads me to more pain now because of that.


Then, it hurts me more to find out that the cours­es L want­ed to go, is not actu­al­ly there. How the fuck did I get so fool­ish to allow that to hap­pen? I should be wis­er than that. How the fuck did I even start­ed to con­sid­er that this is one of the ways to get things done?

I seri­ous­ly don’t know what the fuck is going inside my mind when I make that kin­da pro­pos­al. Seri­ous­ly.

I feel like cry­ing. No, I don’t just want to cry. I feel so fuck­ing humil­i­at­ed because of what that guy did to me. I mean, how can I be so fuck­ing stu­pid to accept this kin­da deal when I have not even man­age to check the details with L?

Geeze, maybe I should have just jump down the build­ing.

3 Responses to Love makes you do stupid things

  1. pjpumper April 28, 2008 at 1:09 am #

    i read all your entries and i could only find all fault lies in you and not L.love will nev­er make you do stu­pid things, only obsession.you are not in love, you like to think you are in love. you had L, you let it go. let your “love” go and if it does find its way back, you will know it’s true.

  2. Cedric Ang April 28, 2008 at 1:13 am #

    PJpumper, being obsess is okay, I think. I may think that I am in love, and yes I did let L go once. I know the prob­lem, and the prob­lem has always been me. Thanks for com­ing.

  3. Paul April 28, 2008 at 9:02 pm #

    Been read­ing through the posts. Maybe you should just take it slow for a while 🙂