Defeating the negative devils

Things did not went as I would have wanted it to be. Almost immediately after I posted the entry, L messaged in my MSN urging me to go for the test. It was left as an offline message because I wasn’t online at that moment.

He came online that day. I was online the same time as he was. I was still contemplating if I should tell him or not. I choose to let him know, at least I would want to be responsible for that action. The act that I should have been for a testing before engaging in a relationship with someone as young and adorable and LOVING as my boy friend.

I told him, he said he knew what was it about. I had no idea about the offline message that he had sent me because my MSN was not capable of receiving such. L was being very very supportive. From his words, he seems to be calm, which is a good thing. I guess the biggest obstacle to face now is me, and only myself.

Anyways,

That was easy, I thought.

Perhaps my greatest fear was myself. I could not bear with the results; I do not wish to attend any counseling sessions either. It’s all the same thing, they are just a bunch of audio recordings that tells you not to worry, the future is still bright, the understand how we feel and etc. All these bullshit, I have heard them all.

I keep on telling myself to calm down. Sleeplessness is not going to help with the situation.

I am going to make any appointment with Pink Triangle, then we will see what is next. Wish me luck, I need lots of them. Oh, thank you guys again for the encouraging emails and comments. I really appreciate it a lot.

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2 Responses to Defeating the negative devils

  1. hcfoo February 29, 2008 at 12:45 pm #

    Hope you’ll be okay, man.

  2. Hoknotyalc March 22, 2008 at 1:22 am #

    Hope all is well. Hugs