The failed friendship

My wor­ries final­ly catch up with me. After our attempt to lure David into our three­some act, my wor­ries was about Har­ry; whether can he accept our ‘extra cur­ric­u­lar’ activ­i­ty

It has been three days since I have heard from Har­ry. The last time I talked with him was when he was on his way back to his home­town (school hol­i­days and all) and he final­ly had time to get online. He did not men­tion any­thing much, and I thought every­thing is fine.

On Tues­day, Har­ry final­ly replied to my numer­ous mes­sages that I have sent. He said that he was busy with school and such, thats why he had been ‘away’ for the week­end. His text mes­sages were slow, and very unusu­al.

The then reveal that he was also busy, and want­ed to be alone with his boy friend.

I was sur­prised.

To fur­ther my already sur­prised state of mine, Har­ry told me that he want to cut con­tacts with me because he do not feel good about us being friends.

I am not sure what had trig­gered Har­ry, but he sent me a text mes­sage say­ing “Point is, let’s just cut con­tact with each oth­er. All d best. Bye”

I called Har­ry on his mobile. No answer. I tried again and Har­ry answered.

I was try­ing to find out was it because of the sex that we had that he want­ed to this. Not for­get­ting that the boy done this to me before, and I was then not sure what I should be doing.

Harry’s boy friend was beside him, and snatch the phone from Har­ry.

I know who are you. You don’t dis­turb my boyfriend, I know all about you Cedric. CedricAng.com isn’t it? I know”

I wasn’t sur­prised. To know some­thing that is pub­licly known, and the per­son thinks he knows me. For all he knows, he prob­a­bly knows jack­shit, and tries to brain­wash Har­ry into think­ing that I am a bad per­son. I don’t care.

I con­tin­ue talk­ing with Har­ry, still reluc­tant with his deci­sions, he want­ed it to end that way.

I guess, I have to respect him, for one, because I treat him as a friend, and sec­ond­ly I real­ly do not want him to feel uncom­fort­able because of what had hap­pen.

It was my mis­take. I should not have done that with­out think­ing about the reper­cus­sion of the things that might hap­pen because sex is involved.

Yes, the sex ses­sion was pleas­ant, but I think after that, I could sense that Har­ry regret the deci­sion. Back then, I did not think much about it.

Har­ry said in a text mes­sage “I just don’t feel nice. That’s it. Besides my bf doesn’t want me to befriend any gay friends.”

We had plan to have a eat in lunch at my place and I will be cook­ing. I know that Har­ry likes car­bonara, and I had bought every­thing.

I guess, some­times we could not under­stand how a human being would thing. Per­haps we should not try to pre­dict the future too much, because every­thing that you do now, always and will influ­ence the out­come in the future.

Just like me and Har­ry, just because both of us were horny at that time, we fucked.

The con­se­quences is that I have lost a great bud­dy, a good friend. If I was giv­en the choice to take back what I have done, I would have done so.

I do not know Har­ry that well for that long peri­od of time. The truth is, I like Har­ry a lot, not sex­u­al­ly, but per­son­al­ly as a friend, and a good bud­dy.

I guess, this teach­es us a les­son, to always keep our dick in our pants.

, , , , ,

9 Responses to The failed friendship

  1. m a r v z April 23, 2009 at 8:39 pm #

    Cedric,

    True — when you own a pub­lic blog such as this, every­thing you write will be analysed down to its fin­er point from the way you struc­ture your words, the choos­ing of appro­pri­ate words and the big empha­sis on how you por­tray your emo­tions expressed in your blog.

    Per­haps one should prac­tice restraint or absti­nence in the face of absolute desire — espe­cial­ly when the cir­cum­stances will cause major reper­cus­sions lat­er.

    Although I admire your apolo­gies and your com­plete omis­sion of guilt — still the essence of induc­ing infi­deli­ty lingers in the air which acts like a stain to your name … and I would empathise with Har­rys’ sit­u­a­tion clear­ly.

    Keep on blog­ging dude. — M

    • Cedric Ang April 24, 2009 at 1:43 pm #

      @m a r v z,

      I don’t real­ly give a fly­ing fuck when peo­ple judge me base on what I write. Get to know me, then they can judge me.

  2. cyrus April 28, 2009 at 4:13 pm #

    u r real­ly tough.….

  3. ernie May 11, 2009 at 6:17 pm #

    Yes! don’t give a fuck what ppl said based on our thought. Years ago i was over­ly care­ful with what i want­ed to write in my blog, then it came to me that how my blog fol­low­er going to know me if i keep myself in a box. I’m glad i made the leap..

    You can say what you want but it won’t change my mind, i’m still the same..

    Thanks for link­ing me blog to yours.

    • Cedric Ang May 11, 2009 at 6:21 pm #

      @ernie,

      I have learn that the hard way, I sup­posed.

  4. ernie May 11, 2009 at 6:46 pm #

    not to wor­ry.. we grew stronger by the moment.

    Enjoy read­ing your post! Keep it up y’all!

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. The Spaghetti incident | Cedric Ang - April 28, 2009

    […] and David try if my cook­ing were bet­ter. Of course, things did not went as we planned, as Har­ry had ignored me for the […]

  2. Harry is back | Cedric Ang - June 16, 2009

    […] was hap­py for Har­ry actu­al­ly, it has been almost two months since Har­ry had spo­ken with me. Wasn’t sure what had hap­pened between them, but I guess […]

Leave a Reply